I find that suffering tends to orient me to the here and now. God often uses it to pull me in and help me not run too far of head of myself, or perhaps too far ahead of Him. Pain makes the present tense very present, if you know what I mean. I don't often find myself day dreaming about the future during difficult days, rather the reality of the here and now keeps me focused on how to simply navigate through my day.
It might seem strange to say that I've been living in the present tense for years now. Is that an oxymoron? Alzheimers diagnosis and intense care of a live-in parent (2003-2005), my cancer diagnosis and treatment (2005), chronic pain following cancer treatment (2005-present), my son diagnosed with and battling a serious and chronic illness (2010-present), another live-in parent needing total care (2011-present) have all comprised my "present tense" for the last 10 years.
The Lord has been with us in the midst of it all, not a helpless spectator but an Active Orchestrator. He and I have often wrestled together (picture a dad wrestling with his little child... always gentle, never crushing). He has been a patient Parent, ever teaching me more about His love for me and my family.
This past week He helped me in a practical yet profound way to have a new lens through which to view my present tense. I was reading Psalm 92, and though I read the whole Psalm, I didn't really get beyond verses 1-2.
"It is good to give thanks to the LORD and to sing praises to Your name, O Most High; to declare Your lovingkindness in the morning and Your faithfulness by night."
The psalmist is having a conversation with the Lord and recognizes that it is good to give thanks to the Lord but he didn't leave us wondering how to do it; he actually shows us. He tells us that first thing in the morning we can declare (literally to be conspicuous, to tell, to make known) God's lovingkindness. Before our feet ever hit the floor we can assert what we know to be true: "God, You are full of lovingkindness." And once out of bed we can look for someone with whom we can conspicuously share that glorious news.
Then at night, at the end of the day when we climb into bed, we can look back on our day and recount God's faithfulness. Faithfulness is something that comes into focus as we look back over the events of the day and see how God met us and intervened according to our need. In other words, after living through our day experiencing God's grace and care and strength and help, we can declare, "Yes, God, you are not only full of lovingkindness, but look at how faithful You were to carry me through this day!" Do you see the bookends?
Perhaps you are so weighed down by the burdens of your present pain that it's hard to apprehend the lovingkindness of the Lord. Let me encourage you with this thought from Hannah Whitall Smith (1870).
"Let your faith 'throw its arms around all God has told you' and in every dark hour remember that 'though now for a season, if need be, you are in heaviness through manifold temptations,' it is only like going through a tunnel. The sun has not ceased shining because the traveler through the tunnel has ceased to see it; and the Sun of righteousness is still shining, although you in your dark tunnel do not see Him. Be patient and trustful and wait. This time of darkness is only permitted that 'the trial of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ.'"
If you are finding it difficult to find the words, let Psalm 103 gives you some specific expressions of His lovingkindness to throw your arms around.
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget none of His benefits... He
This is our sovereign God whose lovingkindness is from everlasting to everlasting (v. 17). That's a lot to throw our arms around, isn't it?
May the bookends of declaring His lovingkindness each morning and recounting His faithfulness each night frame your day and give you peace and joy in your present tense.
It might seem strange to say that I've been living in the present tense for years now. Is that an oxymoron? Alzheimers diagnosis and intense care of a live-in parent (2003-2005), my cancer diagnosis and treatment (2005), chronic pain following cancer treatment (2005-present), my son diagnosed with and battling a serious and chronic illness (2010-present), another live-in parent needing total care (2011-present) have all comprised my "present tense" for the last 10 years.
The Lord has been with us in the midst of it all, not a helpless spectator but an Active Orchestrator. He and I have often wrestled together (picture a dad wrestling with his little child... always gentle, never crushing). He has been a patient Parent, ever teaching me more about His love for me and my family.
This past week He helped me in a practical yet profound way to have a new lens through which to view my present tense. I was reading Psalm 92, and though I read the whole Psalm, I didn't really get beyond verses 1-2.
"It is good to give thanks to the LORD and to sing praises to Your name, O Most High; to declare Your lovingkindness in the morning and Your faithfulness by night."
The psalmist is having a conversation with the Lord and recognizes that it is good to give thanks to the Lord but he didn't leave us wondering how to do it; he actually shows us. He tells us that first thing in the morning we can declare (literally to be conspicuous, to tell, to make known) God's lovingkindness. Before our feet ever hit the floor we can assert what we know to be true: "God, You are full of lovingkindness." And once out of bed we can look for someone with whom we can conspicuously share that glorious news.
Then at night, at the end of the day when we climb into bed, we can look back on our day and recount God's faithfulness. Faithfulness is something that comes into focus as we look back over the events of the day and see how God met us and intervened according to our need. In other words, after living through our day experiencing God's grace and care and strength and help, we can declare, "Yes, God, you are not only full of lovingkindness, but look at how faithful You were to carry me through this day!" Do you see the bookends?
Perhaps you are so weighed down by the burdens of your present pain that it's hard to apprehend the lovingkindness of the Lord. Let me encourage you with this thought from Hannah Whitall Smith (1870).
"Let your faith 'throw its arms around all God has told you' and in every dark hour remember that 'though now for a season, if need be, you are in heaviness through manifold temptations,' it is only like going through a tunnel. The sun has not ceased shining because the traveler through the tunnel has ceased to see it; and the Sun of righteousness is still shining, although you in your dark tunnel do not see Him. Be patient and trustful and wait. This time of darkness is only permitted that 'the trial of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ.'"
If you are finding it difficult to find the words, let Psalm 103 gives you some specific expressions of His lovingkindness to throw your arms around.
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget none of His benefits... He
- pardons all your iniquities (v.3)
- heals all your diseases (v.3)
- redeems your life from the pit (v.4)
- crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion (v.4)
- satisfies your years with good things so that your strength is renewed (v.5)
- performs righteous deeds & judgements for all who are oppressed (v.6)
- makes known His ways to us (v.7)
- is compassionate & gracious, slow to anger & abounding in lovingkindness (v.8)
- has NOT dealt with us according to our sins (v.10)
- has removed our sins from us as far as the east is from the west (v.12)
- has compassion like a father (v.13)
- knows our frame and is mindful that we are but dust (v.14)
This is our sovereign God whose lovingkindness is from everlasting to everlasting (v. 17). That's a lot to throw our arms around, isn't it?
May the bookends of declaring His lovingkindness each morning and recounting His faithfulness each night frame your day and give you peace and joy in your present tense.
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