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A Look in the Mirror

3/30/2021

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Truth be known, the older I become, the harder it gets looking in the mirror. My face, my hair, my body reflect back to me lines of care, more gray, and the scars of a battle with cancer. Today, however, I didn't have a run in with my bathroom mirror but rather with the spiritual mirror. When I took an honest look, I didn't like what my soul reflected back... the lines of life's cares that hadn't been lifted up to the Lord, a cold, gray heart that had been unsuccessfully pumping through the day without drawing from its life Source, and the scars of a battle with sin (or were those fresh wounds I perceived...). 

Part of me wanted to justify my struggle and focus on the circumstances of life that in all honesty are just plain hard, but then I read Psalm 63, a psalm of David, and found what I was missing... not a "make over" to mask what's really there but rather the honesty of a mirror and the revitalizing balm smoothed on by the God of the word. 


What made Psalm 63 powerfully poignant was not that it was written by a king on his throne enjoying the glory of his kingdom and the allegiance of his subjects. No, it was written when David was fleeing the vehement sword of Saul and found himself in the wilderness of Judah. Yet he wrote, "O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; my soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, in a dry and weary land where there is no water." 

I have to admit when I first started reading, I couldn't echo David's prayer. I was not seeking God earnestly though I needed Him desperately. My soul was not thirsting for Him though parched to the bone
. But I kept reading...

"Because Your lovingkindness is better than life, my lips will praise You. So I will bless You as long as I live; I will lift up my hands in Your name... My soul is satisfied as with marrow and fatness, and my mouth offers praises with joyful lips. When I remember You on my bed, I meditate on You in the night watches, for You have been my help, and in the shadow of Your wings I sing for joy. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me."


It was then the prayer began, 'Lord help me to seek you earnestly, help me to thirst for you and yearn for you in the midst of my wilderness.' It was not going to be because of a change in my circumstances that I might praise Him, but because His lovingkindness is better than even life itself. 'Lord help me to bless You as long as I live...' a tall order when clothed in this body of flesh, yet "as long as I live" happens only one moment at a time. Could I make a choice this moment, right now, with the power and help of my resurrected Savior to bless Him? Might I - energized by His Spirit - take time to meditate on who He is and remember His unchanging faithfulness to me, for He has indeed been my help. It truly is in the shadow of His wings that I can sing for joy. Joy is a rare commodity when life is hard - yet He shows me where it is found: in the shadow of His wings, by His side, even in the midst of the wilderness. 

By God's grace and with His help when I glance in the spiritual mirror, though circumstantially in the wilderness still, may the reflection I see be a soul clinging to God, upheld by His right hand, singing for joy in His presence, and praising the God whose lovingkindness is better than life.

He is Risen!


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Oh That I Had Wings...

3/10/2021

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David exclaimed, "Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest" (Psalm 55:6). He was in great distress as the words preceding this exclamation reveal, "My heart is in anguish within me, and the terrors of death have fallen upon me. Fear and trembling come upon me, and horror has overwhelmed me." Have you ever wished you could take flight and leave your circumstances behind? If only we had wings...

I was reminded this past week that the Christian does indeed have wings, but rather than winging us away from our troubles, they are wings that enable us to fly up, as it were, to the throne of grace where we might receive help in our time of need. As a bird must have two strong wings to fly, we also need two wings to fly up to our heavenly Father. One wing is "Surrender" and the other is "Trust" ~ but how does a human sprout wings? 

Deuteronomy 32:11 tells us...
"Like an eagle that stirs up its nest, that hovers over its young, He spread His wings and caught them, He carried them on His pinions." Hannah Whitall Smith (1832-1911) describes it this way. "The mother eagle teaches her little ones to fly by making their nest so uncomfortable that they are forced to leave it and commit themselves to the unknown world of air outside. And just so does our God to us. He stirs up our comfortable nests, and pushes us over the edge of them, and we are forced to use our wings to save ourselves from fatal falling. Read your trials in this light, and see if you cannot begin to get a glimpse of their meaning. Your wings are being developed" (The Christian's Secret of a Happy Life). And yet look closely, God is there even as we are learning to fly. The mother eagle hovers over her young watching the progress of her eaglets and is ready to catch them and carry them on her pinions when they themselves are too weak.

Not only do trials develop our wings, but our response to our trials does as well... 

"Though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly, yet those who wait for the Lord, will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles..." (Isaiah 40:30-31). 

Are you weary and tired? Do you feel like you are stumbling? Is the Lord stirring up your nest so that you will develop and exercise the wings of Surrender and Trust? That will happen as we learn to wait for (literally: to look for, hope and expect) the Lord.

This past week I felt like a bird with a broken wing. Have you ever watched a bird struggle to take flight with a broken wing? There is a lot of effort, a lot of flapping and false starts, but no flight, only increasing distress. What breaks the wing of Trust but doubt, doubting God's goodness, doubting His promises. And what disables the wing of Surrender but sin, perhaps in the form of anger and frustration at the sovereign God who has lovingly stirred the nest. 


If you, like me, feel like one of your wings is broken, take courage that though your "soul may feel as if it were in a prison from which it cannot escape, and consequently is debarred from mounting up on wings. No earthly bars can ever imprison the soul. No walls however high...can imprison an eagle so long as there is an open way upward; and earth's power can never hold the soul in prison while the upward way is kept open and free. Our enemies may build walls around us as high as they please, but they cannot build any barrier between us and God; and if we "mount up with wings" we can fly higher than any of their walls can ever reach... The only thing that can really imprison the soul is something that hinders its upward flight." 

Don't allow doubt or sin to cloud over your clear path upward. Remember that ultimately the roof of sin has been removed altogether from your prison by the Savior. Trust, Surrender and wait for the Lord.  

"The dove hath neither claw nor sting. 
Nor weapon for the fight,
She owes her safety to the wing,
Her victory to flight.
The bridegroom opens His arms of love,
And in them folds the panting dove."


1 Comment
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    Valorie

    I am first and foremost a follower of the Lord Jesus who is my life (Phil. 1:21). In February 2005, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My diagnosis came 4 months after my mother-in-law was placed on hospice in our home and was succumbing to the ravages of Alzheimers. That journey has changed my life in many ways. Even since that time, the Lord continues to shape this clay vessel through suffering as one of our precious sons battles severe and chronic illness. My heart's desire through this blog is to point people to the God of all comfort who comforts us in all our affliction (2 Cor. 1:3-4) and to encourage those who are burdened to trust in that Man of sorrows who is acquainted with grief 
    (Isaiah 53:3).

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